“Serving overseas as a small-town boy from America is intense, stressful and humorous! Enjoy a light-hearted story with me from our last 20 years overseas!”
—Matt
Squirrels and Reindeer
My trusty pump-action BB gun and Marlin .22 rifle brought me many squirrels in mosquito ridden woodlots around my county. I learned early how to reproduce the rapid chatter of a squirrel – keech-keech-keech-keech. The squirrel would chatter back to me while moving its tail angrily, thinking that another had entered its territory. I would be able to find it in the tree to get my shot. I skinned a few of the squirrels, but my pelt tanning never worked out well and the skins turned out as rigid as a board. If it is possible, my one attempt at squirrel stew turned out even worse than my tanning.
During this current summer I have been traveling and visiting workers that we supervise overseas. Some of these workers serve in the northern regions where reindeer live and are semi-domesticated by the locals. Reindeer, like squirrels, make noises that communicate to one another. They click their knee joints -click-click-click-click. It is so distinctive that other reindeer can determine the size of the other one and know whether to approach it or stay away.
My wife loved the thick reindeer skins that were being sold by vendors in the city market on our summer trip. (We use animal skins to decorate our humid apartment and they also serve to absorb the moisture out of the air.) My wallet told me I needed to negotiate the price down if we wanted to get one. I began the negotiating process that took no small amount of time with the reindeer hide seller. The seller and I both felt exhausted and relieved when the process was finally over, and I bought the skin for 30% less than his starting price.
My wife had been so concerned that the skins would be sold out in the afternoon that we went early in the morning to make that purchase. However, I then had to carry it all day long on my back in a bag that said, “Reindeer Hide.” I looked like a dorky tourist and a potential victim for any aggressive animal rights activist who might spot me.
I was ready to finally get back to our campground where we were staying. However, my wife got a message from a son – he wanted a skin too. With great reluctance from me, and much urging and chuckles from my wife, I approached the reindeer hide seller a second time. The seller smiled and rolled his eyes. We made a gentlemen’s agreement to not go through the haggling process again and he just sold me the second hide at the price of the first one.
I walked through the city center and took two trains to get back to the campground with Rudolf and Blitzer hanging on my back.
Something similar ever happen to you? Contact me and let me hear your story!
mattsmishaps@gmail.com Matt’s Mishaps, PO BOX 114, Grabill, IN 46741
