MATT’S MISHAPS

“Serving overseas as a small-town boy from America is intense, stressful and humorous! Enjoy a light-hearted story with me from our last 20 years overseas!” – Matt

Tree Troubles

After finishing up in college, I took a job as an urban forester in Chicago to pay off college and save money to get married. I had many unusual experiences moving from Indiana to work in big-city Chicago. One of the odd experiences was working for the company that cleaned up after Mr. T’s workout. Mr. T was the muscled Hollywood and TV personality with a mohawk haircut from the 80s who starred in Rocky III and the A-Team. He grew up poor in Chicago and then moved to the suburbs after making his fortune. Mr. T decided to chop down trees with an axe on his property for a workout. He didn’t realize that the trees were protected by local government, so he not only paid for us to remove the trees, but also very hefty fines.

We now live overseas where there are some bizarre trees. We have a tree called the Dragon Tree whose sap is red-brown and was used to varnish stringed instrument instruments. We have a “well tree.” Locals suffered lack of drinkable water. They realized that planting a tree in ravine that had constant heavy fog would catch the moisture on the leaves and they could collect water from the dripping leaves to survive. We have “wind trees” located on mountain cliffs that look like gnarled up bonsai trees believed to be thousands of years old as their slow growth is imperceptible. We also have “colony trees.” It doesn’t matter the species of tree, but the large rats are smart and know to avoid sewers and buildings where they are more easily trapped and killed. Rats climb the trees and live, breed, and nest above the ground. Newly arrived clueless people (like I was) assume that scurrying sounds right above their heads are birds and not aggressive rats that will even attack humans.