Stan’s Ramblings

1969-70 ANTWERP ARCHERS By: Stan Jordan
This basketball picture was given to me by Kathy Nern. Maybe you will remember some of these guys! From left, first row, Jack Schilb, Ed Jones, Dave Miller, Larry Atchley, Rick Schlatter and Tim Peffley. Back row, coach Lonnie Bostelman, Dave McCalla, Mike Culler, Tom Sigg, Neil Ramsier, Steve Peters and Randy Hughes

Sam Rivers, Indiana Agent Chapter 54

By: Stan Jordan

This is the middle of October 1859. We are here at the Indian Agency in Broken Bow, Nebraska Territory.

We have gathered in all of the garden produce, and stashed it away for the winter.

Hunter and the boys took a wagon and a tripod and got in the winter meat supply. They got a young buffalo, bear, couple of deer and some prairie chickens that we will have in the spit tonight.

General Kearney rode in on Rooster’s horse from the fort, just in time for the evening meal. He was worn out from the long trip in one day.

We talked a long time at the fire and then went inside the store and talked some more.

He said, “Let’s rest a couple of days and then go over to the Calamus River Village and help them get ready for the winter.”

Well, we are here with Leaping Buffalo, their chief, and Pony that Walks, their tribal shaman. They are both young fellows, and the General is telling them of all the trouble of the North and South.

The garden produce from the village has been gathered in and put away for winter use. Hunter, Slim and Gardner along with several of the natives went out to get some of their winter meat supply. A number of ladies went with them to do the skinning of the game.

The boys killed 11 buffalo and one small calf. They got four deer and a small bear.

It took a couple of days to get them cleaned and hung up on the rod for curing, and out of the reach of the wolves.

Then we had a big dinner time cookout. Rooster is a big favorite here as he is doing the mess sergeant’s job.

We rested a couple days and then we went over to the Loup River Tribe Village.

We sat around that evening and talked with their leaders and the situation with our government, and the Southern territories and how it will effect our relations with their three villages.

General Kearney and I was very honest with them. He said, “We may not be back for many moons.”

We will not be able to bring any supplies because we don’t have any and due to the war we won’t be getting any.

The General left two rifles and a box of bullets for them to do their hunting next year for their winter meat supply.

The General and I looked them in the eye and told them how it will be for a while. We want them to keep on learning the language and the way of the white man.

Along about sundown, the General asked for the peace pipe. We passed it around the circle twice. In that circle was Limping Buffalo, Pony that Walks from the Broken Bow Village, Soaring Eagle, and Rapid River, the Shaman from the Calamus River Tribe, Yellow Knife of the Loup River Village, along with their gardener named Bumble Bee. We all talked and the natives understand we won’t be back for a while. It was sure a solemn closing.

See ya!

What do you call a cow that doesn’t give milk? An udder failure.

How do you make a milkshake? Give a cow a pogo stick.

Where do cows like to ride on trains? In the cow-boose.

How do you know that cows will be in heaven? It’s a place of udder delight.

What do you call a cow that has two legs? Side of beef.

Why is a barn so noisy? All the cows have horns.

What animals do you bring to bed? Your calves

• A stockholder is a corral for cattle.

• Moscow doesn’t make as much milk as Pa’s cow.

• A blonde bombshell buys a new automatic BMW X8 Sport. She drives the car perfectly well during the day, but at night the car just won’t move at all. She tries driving the car at night for a week but still no luck. She then furiously call the BMW dealer and they send out a technician to her. The technician asks, “Miss, are you sure you are using the right gears?”

Full of anger she replies, “You fool, idiot man, how could you ask such a question. I’m not stupid! I use “D” for the day and “N” for the night.”

Later she was sitting at a light. Some guy pulled up alongside her and challenged her to a race. So she put the car into “R.”

She also determined that using “L” did not help her get to an appointment any earlier if she was late.

But the reason she had to have the car towed to the repair shop was the total destruction of the transmission!

When the service man asked her what happened to destroy the transmission she replied, “I got tired of following this slow moving male driver and started to go around him when I saw an oncoming truck. So I shifted the car into “P” to pass and that is when the transmission broke!’

I am indebted to Karl Mielke for this ‘thigh slapper.’

The Halloween Celebration

By: Stan Jordan

Again this year, the Antwerp Fire Department is sponsoring the Halloween celebration here in Antwerp.

Everything is about like always, about 13 groups and three winners in each group and a grand prize.

The parade will form up over at Van Crest at 3:15 and parade to the fire house starting at 3:30 where the judging will begin.

The trick or treat will be from 5:00 – 6:30 p.m. on Saturday, October 28th.

Yes, I know, October 31st is Halloween, but that is also a school day.

Riverside Christian Church will have their free stand with Holy Wienies for the Halloweenies, and bottled water.

See ya!

A little on Christopher Columbus

By: Stan Jordan

He was an explorer, born in Genoa in 1451 and he moved to Spain and that was his home for the rest of his life.

Columbus estimated the Earth to be a sphere and he figured the distance from the Canary Islands to Japan was 3000 miles, but it really was 12, 200 miles.

His first contact with America was when he set foot on the Bahama Islands. Then he traveled to Cuba and he thought that was China.

The king of Spain put up the money for the first trip to the west. There were three ships, The Nina, The Pinta and The Santa Maria. The journey took 39 days.

He declared the new land belonged to Spain. He treated the natives badly and even executed some of them and they later complained to the Monarchy and Columbus lost his rank as govenor and was sent home in chains.

On the first voyage the ship, Santa Maria, went aground and sank. The sailors noticed that some of the natives wore gold trinkets and that started the trouble.

Overall Columbus made four trips to the New World. On the third voyage was when, as govenor, his title was suspended, he was even returned to Spain in chains in 1500.

In 1504 he was in trouble with the natives of Jamaica and they would not allow him any food. He remembered from his almanac that there would be an eclipse on February 29, 1504. He knew of its occurrence and he played on their stupidity that he was a God. He was offered  provisions and helped. The Royal Govenor of  Hispaniola sent a rescue party and the crew and Columbus were sent back to Spain.

In the remaining year of his life, following the last voyage to America, Columbus struggled to regain some of his lost titles. Although he regained some of his riches in May 1505, his titles were never returned. He died May 20, 1506, still believing he discovered a new route to Asia. He was 55 years old.

Horsepower Holiday

By: Stan Jordan

Dan and Traci Bowers, owners of Advanced Chassis over on Victory Lane tell me that their big Horsepower Holiday (there is not a single horse in it) will be held at the Paulding County Fairground October 27th and 28th. This is the second annual event.

There will be 3-wheelers and 4-wheelers, there is an obstacle course for you to tackle, some dry and some muddy. Some have one hundred horsepower and some have twenty times that amount. There will be some units from all over Northwest Ohio.

Like I’ve said before: Horsepower! Horsepower! The weak and timid might not fit in.

See ya!

The sheriff’s first 100 days

By: Stan Jordan

Bryce Steiner, the whip cracker at the West Bend News, said “Why don’t you do a column on Sheriff Lander’s first 100 days in the new jail, you know like they do in Washington D.C.?”

Well, the sheriff came in for an interview and we had an interesting talk. We talked about the new jail and the workers that are getting use to everything.

They took in their first prisoner on June the 8th and they have taken in 172 since then. They have 21 prisoners on average, that includes both male and females.

Jason said that all the correction officers have taken their training and are doing fine. He has 45 full time employees and 16 correction officers assigned to the jail. He said, so far, things at the jail have ran pretty smooth. He said the biggest problem is when a person on drugs comes in, it takes about 2-3 weeks for the detox action and that takes some care. When an intoxicated person comes in, there is the usual sickness and vomiting and other care for a while. Of course when a prisoner arrives, you have the usual inspection and questioning. But the biggest care is when there is a person of mental health problems.

He said it is a lot better on everyone since there is no more travel to the Putnam County Jail to house the prisoners. He said he has received a lot of good feedback on that subject.

The jail commissioner is Pete Leatherman, a local person, as are all of the employees.

Jason said he hears from some of the families and people on the street. We have a good relationship and respect. Things for the last 100 days have been good. Just about what we figured and the time has passed fairly fast.

See ya!